(lurker here, great blog; after marathoning S7-11 reading your posts has been cathartic) I hate the argument that Benny’s a deliberate threat to the bond. He stayed on the wagon, backed off when told to and even saved Sam (despite Martin). Is it cause Dean likes him and they parted on good terms that he’s a threat? Is it so terrible that Dean had a friend he cared about that Sam didn’t like? Dean loves his bro but not everything/one Dean values has to be approved by Sam. Dean is his own person.

squirrelsan:

deanisdarkness:

Thank you.

You are absolutely right about everything. Dean is his own person, yes, but sadly, the show and the fandom does not treat him like that. He’s expected to revolve around other characters, his worth is measured in terms of his devotion to his family (can you see how Dean is coded here?) and if he fails to fulfill his duties toward his family(mostly toward Sam but Cas too) – he’s punished by the narrative and other characters. Of course, if he becomes all about Sam then he’s called selfish and is punished/berated for being too clingy.(Red Meat, Purge)

Benny was Dean’s friend. He saved Dean’s life, he was a redeemed vampire, he wasn’t harming anyone. When Dean came back from hell in S4, he took time to listen to Sam and thanked Ruby for saving Sam. Dean thanked a demon, bc the said demon had saved Sam’s life.  Did Sam thought to thank Benny for saving Dean’s life? No, Sam repaid Benny by sticking a crazy hunter on his trail. I mean, Sam was all happy and settled in his “normal life” but Dean was fighting for his life everyday, in Purgatory. Benny was there for Dean when Sam and Castiel had abandoned him in a place full of monsters. Benny fought beside Dean for a year, Benny earned Dean’s trust,
Benny kept Dean’s trust. He was Dean’s friend.

Dean is allowed to have friends, Dean is allowed to keep friends, Dean is allowed to have relationships outside of Sam, it’s common sense. The whole “Benny disrupted sainted brotherly bond” argument only shows us the not-so-perfect sides of the much hyped brotherly-bond. If Sam and Dean weren’t brothers, if Sam and Dean were in a romantic relationship, then people would be appalled by Sam’s “you don’t get to have friends Dean, without my permission you don’t” attitude. By asking Dean to forsake his friends/relationships in Sacrifice, Sam actually forced Dean to become all about Sam again. I think, his resentment for Benny also came from a similarly ugly place of  “how Dean can dare to have friends without my approval” mentality.

But since the show and the fandom refuses to treat Dean as a person we are stuck with this unhealthy mess of a bond- what’s more we are even told to view this bond as worthy of celebration. Yeah.

THIS!